16 Months of waiting

Well, today is our 16th Month Anniversary for the Log In Date of our paperwork to China. Kind of a strange anniversary to have, but looks like we'll have at least 2-3 more. The baby referrals for the next batch will likely only cover a week or so, but we are praying that they will go a little further.

Currently we are taking Chinese language classes, boy is that a hard language! Everything is so hinged on the tones that you make. One wrong tone & you could end up saying something really embarrassing. We are really enjoying the class & the cultural information that our teacher shares about her country. This has helped to make our wait a little more bearable.

Our next big milestone is completing Matt's Sr. Project & then graduation on May 4th!! It seems hard to believe that 4 years has gone by & that he is finally reaching the end. I guess that God has perfect timing for everything since this wait has allowed him to focus on finishing his degree.

Adoption Attachment Information

As stated in the 'latest news' section of our website, we have been reading up on adoption attachment. I will post some reference links at the end of this post if you would like to do some additional reading on this topic.

We have decided on some policies that we want everyone to know about now (prior to our baby coming home), so no one will be offended when the actual event occurs. Please understand that we are doing what we feel is best for our child & appreciate your support in this. Also, being not only first time parents but also parents of a child who has potentially spent the first year of her life in institutional care, we will be on the cautious side when it comes to promoting attachment. That's not to say that things could potentially be relaxed depending on how everything is going, but we would rather prepare now (plan for the worst, pray for the best).

Our policies to promote attachment are as follows:
1. No one will hold Madison for the first 3 months except Matt or Tanya. If you would like to get close to her you can sit next to one of us on the couch or we can sit her on the floor by us & you can see her there.
2. No one will feed, bathe, change, rock to sleep Madison except Matt or Tanya for 3 months.
3. We respectfully request that visits be kept at a minimum for the 2-3 weeks after we return home. We will plan to have a dedication of Madison at church & a party following so everyone who wants to meet her can.

Please let us know if you have any questions on this. Again, we do not want to hurt anyone's feelings and we appreciate your support in this effort. Our goal is to raise a healthy, happy, well adjusted child and know that you will help us in this.

Reference info:
http://www.peds.umn.edu/peds/iac/postadoption/attachment.html
http://www.a4everfamily.org/index.php
http://www.olderchildadoption.com/rad/solidattachment.htm

Attachment in Adoption, by Deborah Gray

Nursery Pictures

Here are some pictures of the nursery we have set up. We didn't have much luck loading these to our regular website, so hopefully this will work better. My mom made the quilt & valances. Thanks Mom for all your work on these!!

Getting closer

This week or early the following the next set of referrals will be sent out. There is rumblings that this group will go through 10/12 or 10/13/05. With a log in date (LID) of 11/23/05 this brings us just a little bit closer. We are hoping that we will finally get to see the face of our precious baby in May.

This time of the month is allows hard for me. I wait along with all of the other families that are expecting referrals even though my time has not yet come.

I have been busy planning for things we need to do & get before our trip. After being so far away it's a little unreal that we are so close finally. There's a Chris Rice song that sums up this whole wait called 'Smile'

How far are you, how close am I
I know your words are true and I don't feel them inside
Still I believe you'll never leave
So where are you now

You're all I have, You're all I know
Your breath is breathing in my soul
Still I am gasping, aching, asking
Where are you now

Cause I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile

My journey's here, but my heart is There
So I dream and wait, and keep the faith, while You prepare
Our destiny, til You come back for me
Oh, please make it soon!

Cause I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feels like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile

I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

I just wanna be with You
I just want this waiting to be over
I just want to be with You
And it helps to know the Day is getting closer

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feel like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You

Every minute takes an hour
Every inch feel like a mile
Til I won't have to imagine
And I finally get to see You smile

Happy New Year!

We are excited that this is the year we will meet our daughter! There are so many things we are hopeful for, but this is our most exciting milestone.

There is rumblings that the next batch of referrals has started to arrive and are currently projected to include log in dates thru 09/27/05. This brings us closer (with a LID of 11/23/05), but still about 4-5 months away.

We never dreamed when we started this journey that we would still be on the waiting path. It has been a hard, slow climb, but we are getting so close we can almost taste it.